Please note: This information was as current as we could make it on the date given above. But medical information is always changing, and some information given here may be out of date. For regularly updated information on a variety of health topics, please visit familydoctor.org, the AAFP patient education Web site.

An article on this topic is available in this issue of AFP.

When You Are the Caregiver

Who is a caregiver?

You're a caregiver if you give basic care to a person who has a chronic medical condition. A chronic condition is an illness that doesn't go away.

Some types of basic care are helping with bathing, dressing and feeding. Helping with household chores like cleaning, cooking and shopping is also basic care. Many people with chronic medical conditions like cancer, stroke, multiple sclerosis or dementia (Alzheimer's disease) need extra help.

If you're a caregiver, you might be doing these things for another person:

• Lifting
• Turning them in bed
• Bathing
• Hugging them
• Dressing
• Feeding them
• Making them smile or laugh
• Cooking
• Shopping
• Crying with them
• Paying their bills
• Running errands
• Sharing memories
• Giving medicine

How can I tell if caregiving is putting too much stress on me?

You may be feeling sad or blue. You may be crying more often than before. You may not have the energy level you used to have. You may feel like you don't have any time to yourself. You may not be seeing friends or relatives as often as you used to. You may have trouble sleeping, or you may not feel like getting out of bed in the morning. You may have trouble eating or you may be eating too much. You may notice you've lost interest in your hobbies or the things you used to do with friends or family. You may become angry with the person you are caring for or angry at other people or situations. You may ask yourself "why me?"

You may not get any thanks from the person you are caring for. This may add to your feelings of frustration.

Why is caring for someone with dementia (Alzheimer's disease) so hard?

The person you're caring for may not know you any more. That person may be too ill to talk or follow simple plans. This may make it hard for you to think of that person the same way.

The person you're caring for may have behavior problems, like yelling, hitting and wandering away from home. This behavior may make you feel angry at times.

What should I do if I'm feeling overwhelmed and have some of the signs mentioned above?

These feelings are not wrong or strange. Caregiving can be very stressful. Because being a caregiver is so hard, some doctors think of caregivers as "hidden patients." If you don't take care of yourself and stay well, you won't be able to help anyone else. Talk with your family doctor and discuss your feelings. Stay in touch with your friends and family members. Ask them for help in giving care. You're not a failure because you ask for help.

Look for help in your community. Start by asking your church or synagogue if they have services or volunteers who can help you. You also can ask for help from the organizations listed below.

Where can I find out about community services that can give me help or information?

Eldercare Locator Telephone: 1-800-677-1116 This is a nationwide service for finding area agencies on aging. These agencies can help you find services such as adult day care, home aids and social workers in your area. National Administration of Aging Telephone: 1-202-619-7501 Web address: http://www.aoa.dhhs.gov American Association of Retired Persons Telephone: 1-800-424-3410 They have a free caregiver resource kit (ask for No. D15267). National Family Caregivers Association Telephone: 1-800-896-3650 Web address: http://www.nfcacares.org

Children of Aging Parents Telephone: 1-215-945-6900 Web address: http://www.careguide.cgi/caps/capshome.htm The Well Spouse Foundation Telephone: 1-800-838-0879 Web address: http://www.wellspouse.org CareGuide.com Web address: http://www.careguide.net This Web site is a personal resource for caregivers. Caregiving Online Web address: http://www.caregiving.com This Web site offers online support through a newsletter. Caregiverzone.com Web address: http://www.caregiverzone.com This Web site offers information for family caregivers, seniors and others.

Is there a resource just for caregivers of people with dementia (Alzheimer's disease)?

Alzheimer's Association
Telephone: 1-800-272-3900
Web address: http://www.alz.org

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This handout provides a general overview on this topic and may not apply to everyone. To find out if this handout applies to you and to get more information on this subject, talk to your family doctor.

Visit familydoctor.org for information on this and many other health-related topics.

Copyright © 2000 by the American Academy of Family Physicians.
Permission is granted to print and photocopy this material for nonprofit educational uses. Written permission is required for all other uses, including electronic uses.

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